Sailor Moon S Episode 33 - Believe in Love! Ami, a Kind-Hearted Soldier

Seeing as how I'm on a roll with the catching up, let's get ourselves finally back up to current with things shall we? That's right, it's right back to Sailor Moon! Just a few more episodes and then sweet sweet freedom shall be mine.

Or actually not really since I'll still have two whole seasons left to go through oh god damn it. But maybe they won't be as bad as most of this series was? We'll see.

So today on the episode preview, stuff is happening at Mugen academy and I guess they've got some practice exam thing? Oh but you know what goes with tests? AMI. Which makes this a focus episode of sorts?

Welp, roll those intro sequences and let's get down to business.

Also, can I just add to this how friggin' sweet the intro sounds with my new speakers? It is simply delightful.

But the episode begins right where it left off, with the girls look at Telulu's student passport, and then we realize they're actually over at Rei's place staring at it when Usagi bursts in screaming and laughing like the idiot she is.

But she isn't screaming for no reason, of course. Ami done got herself some perfect scores again, on a national level and that's something now isn't it?

Either Rei is just really surprised, or she's suffering a stroke.

Of course though, everyone is somehow SURPRISED by this instead of, I dunno, gradually accepting of this since getting perfect scores on every test ever conceived by mankind is kind of her thing?? Oh but she isn't alone either, according to Ami. There's some other stuck-up bitch out there performing just as admirably. Some chick named Yui Bidoh, who sounds like a pokemon and goes to Mugen Academy. Hang on, isn't that EVIL SCHOOL? How is it not shut down by now?

Also, I thought that was like, a college? Are they now a high school or something...? I'm confused again.

Oh yeah and remember that whole national test thing well it's being held GUESS WHERE.

Again, why is anybody surprised? Also, why is Mina's mouth
not colored in this shot? Lazy animators.

I really don't understand how this is really a surprise for anybody. I mean, again, it is Ami's one and only ESTABLISHED CHARACTER TRAIT. SHE LIKES TO STUDY AND IS SUPER SMART OR SOMETHING GUYS OF COURSE SHE IS TAKING THAT TEST THING DUH.

Man you guys even suck at pretending to care about your friend.

Cue the title slide and let's get the show rolling for real. Today it is SNOWING IN TOKYO. AWW YEAHH. Students are lined up outside the school to take this exam, and the group takes the time to note how everyone here is pretty hard-core about that studying thing, unlike the resident moron who somehow managed to be in charge.

... weird that's almost like exactly how the real world works with business leadership OH WAIT.

Anyways their plan is that while Ami is taking the test the other girls are going to wander the school looking for SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITIES.

Inside, some weird couple is all "LOOKIT ALL DEM STUDENTS ALL DAT FRESH MEAT AWW YISSS."

And I am sure everyone will overlook that thing about how
one of your SUPER POPULAR SPEAKER TEACHERS almost
died last time, right? Or did they forget that already?

Oh and some new bitch is on the scene. Her name is Byruit?

Kind of a snow-themed sexy little number isn't she?

So she's got some kind of plan that is going ahead on schedule. Her plan? To harvest all those pure souls to awaken the Messiah. Also she takes the time to tell Koan to maybe stop trying to get in the Professor's pants all the time and, I dunno, do some work now that she's back on the team again? It's just a thought.

None of these women get along at all, geez.

Then we cut to Chibiusa running around the streets - again, ALONE - and wanders across Mamoru randomly driving and he's like "yo where you going shrimp" and she's just like "I dunno somewhere BYE" and darts off into a DARK ALLEYWAY.

Thinking this is perfectly okay Mamoru drives off, and notes that Setsuna is tailing his future daughter and goes "oh that's weird I AM SURE THERE IS NO REASON FOR ME TO QUICKLY FIND A PLACE TO PARK OR ANYTHING."

We find ourselves over at Hotaru's place, which has been empty for some time as you'll recall. Koan kidnapped Hotaru, and Chibiusa is all remembering that stuff and how weird it is and wants to know where her friend is.

But now we're back at Mugen Academy where shit is going to be going down. Academically.

Which makes this the perfect time for our favorite group of girls to stand around gossiping about how much they can't stand these super studious types studying hard for their futures or anything. What's with them anyways?

Even the animation in this episode feels kind of lackluster, like they just couldn't really be bothered to care all that much.

Ah, but some girl threads her way through the crowd, and approaches Ami, asking to make sure she's found the right girl.

Gee she looks an awful lot like that girl we saw in that other scene.

I'll spare you the painful conversation where she tries to insinuate Usagi must be super smart to be friends with Ami and Usagi somehow manages to come across to her as 'funny'. But ignoring that she has to show Ami a thing right now that will 'help her with her studying'.

Yes, go ahead and run off with this perfect stranger. That never ends poorly. Also: ignore the fact that your friend was literally dragged away by some perfect stranger, I'm sure she'll be fine so go ahead and explore the building.

Outside it keeps snowing, and Haruka and Michiru are, as you'd imagine, watching over the exams like hawks. They've got this bad feeling about the school and they aren't leaving until they figure out what's the deal. Lucky for them they... go here?

The two girls decide to go and investigate "that room" in the basement.

Y'know, if they've known about it for so long why in the hell did they not look into this sooner?

Meanwhile in the basement... shit happens.

I don't know about you but this seems like a really dumb idea.

Ami is being introduced first-hand into a thing that we've seen several times without it being actually explained what it was. I'm not sure the explanation given is actually anything close to the truth either.

Can I just call bullshit on this because this seems like the
kind of thing that would make Neil deGrasse Tyson laugh.

The girl takes the time to explain that we're looking at Tau Ceti (or the Tau Nebula according to the translations? Not sure how accurate that is) but anyways the more important bit is her explaining that the school has five branches. Like a star? Like the Witches club? And the top students? They become... lecturers?

Wait hold on.

So you're a student... who does a teacher's job...
but for free? God you are f***ing stupid.

Ami is understandably surprised that a student is teaching classes here. Yui seems to think it's an amazing thing, but Ami isn't quite so sold on it.

Yeah that's not the reason I'd have picked just saying.

Blah blah to be a good teacher you need to know what it's like for struggling students to learn, blah blah laugh laugh you're so dumb, logic is all you need etc etc.

And that's how you became a sexy robot maid scientist. Who strips.

Ami argues about how science needs emotions or some shit, then the bell rings and they have to go take exams or something. Also some insults about Ami seeming dumb.

Speaking of Ami she keeps staring at that globe thing, and the professor gets a vaguely bad feeling about her being around.

Then Yui shows up, announces that Ami might be one of the Sailor Soldiers, and strips into her other outfit while declaring that she'll be getting to the bottom of this.

And you probably thought I was joking about the stripping.

After that she grabs Koan by the jacket, throws her to the floor, and kneels down in front of the Professor claiming that all of this is her responsibility, so if Ami is an enemy she'll just take her out no big deal.

Yes because all of the empirical data clearly shows that
this has never been an issue before.

For someone who claims to be so smart, she really seems pretty blind to the overwhelming evidence in front of her that killing off any of the Scouts thus far has proven to end in failure without some serious backup - and even then most attempts have been foiled by OTHER PEOPLE GETTING INVOLVED.

Just saying, she seems like a pretty shit scientist.

*ahem* NANOMACHINES?! /solidsnakeimpression

So according to her, her super amazing NANOMACHINES will guarantee her success, and the Professor decides to let her do as she please like she's some kind of Mundo. But before she goes, the girl needs to question why Koan even bothered coming back from the dead.

Pretty sure she didn't really have much of a choice in that? Just saying.

Now she heads out... somewhere, and sets her plan into motion. Time to have the computers eat some peoples' hearts while the girls wander around aimlessly. They witness the pure hearts being ripped out, and decide this is probably a bad thing since they're being sucked into the computers. Guess this probably does have something to do with those Death Busters that they'll figure out after this message from our sponsors.

After the break we find Haruka and Michiru running into that underground lab where entry is prohibited, having decided that sitting on this without looking into it is probably biting them in the ass right now.

Yep, this place is totally restricted, better not get caught by
the completely nonexistent security here.

They go down Escher's stairs, swipe a card, and manage to open these big heavy doors to discover...

Oh hell, it's the creepy palace of playtime.

Oh hey there Evil Hotaru. What are you doing here? Oh wait Ami is here too now? Did she just... teleport behind the other two? That's... kind of weird but whatever. She demands they not hurt that girl. Which kind of doesn't work with their plans considering as far as they know this girl is going to end everything as we know it?

Haruka thinks that she's being soft and stuff, and that you should never show sympathy to your enemy. After all, this girl is kind of on the path to kind of destroy the entire universe? That seems like a big deal.

Ami makes a great point however: Hotaru has, technically speaking, committed no crime. I'm not sure if she's paid her dues, or served her sentence time after time. But none of that matters because Yui shows up behind all three of them.

Was it? We must have missed the sign that said "you shouldn't
be here or something but nobody will stop you so please leave".

She recognizes all three of them, calls them by name, and rips off her clothes to reveal... something we already knew. Why the super dramatic reveal when we've already seen you in this outfit THREE TIMES this episode?

Haruka and Michiru get blasted by a thing of course as they charge Evil Hotaru, and Ami is left untouched. So it's up to Ami to try and save everyone because that's what she does. Then lady fires a laser thing, pops some balloons, and kind of wakes up THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

Oh never mind she falls back asleep TIME TO TRANSFORM.

Dude. Seriously? Why are you surprised? YOU EVEN SAID
YOU THOUGHT THIS MIGHT BE A THING THAT HAPPENS.

Blah blah don't abuse science blah blah imma Water you to death. Oh no but NANOMACHINES get Sailor Mercury and will devour her body leaving only her pure heart. What a good sacrifice or something but then those OTHER girls show up.

Gee, who would have thought that like EVERY OTHER ENCOUNTER WITH THE SAILOR WARRIORS THAT THE OTHERS WOULD BE NEARBY.

She seems to think this is a good thing of course, and gets to work attacking the girls while Ami figures a way out of her predicament.

Now is the time for Uranus and Neptune to transform though and save the day despite being pinned to the ground. Guess they weren't that bad off anyways and were just lying around for no reason?

And once again the enemy is SURPRISED by this and gets Earthquaked and Tidal Waved to death.

Which leaves her open to be Holy Grail Mega Heart'd to death.

D-did... did you just... seriously...?

I had no idea they referred to her as SUPER SAILOR MOON. Or if they did I forgot all about it. Who cares it's time to do that grail thing and end this nonsense. So twirly stuff occurs and some purging begins.

Ah but she tries to use her Nanomachines to block the attack but they turn on her after being damaged, and wind up beginning to eat her alive. They are just following orders - not your orders but hey, that's what you get for programming something WITHOUT EMOTION AND STUFF DURR HURR.

Then things just start exploding, hearts are returned to people, and everything is great or something I guess.

Kaorinite is pleased because she didn't have to kill anyone with a backstab like everyone else does, the Professor is happy because now he knows who the Sailor Scouts are, and the girls are sad because some other girl is being eaten alive by her own creation. Whoops.

Then she vanishes, and Sailor Mercury wonders what might have happened if only she believed in love. But then Evil Hotaru starts moving and stuff, and opens a gateway into hell.

WHOOPS SORRY SLEPT IN DIDN'T MEAN TO MISS
THE ENTIRE FIGHT I'M TOTALLY AWAKE NOW.

Then she moves back into the abyss and we are treated to Chibiusa standing in the snwo looking at the empty house yet again. She is joined by Mamoru and Setsuna who don't want her to catch cold, and she explains she just really wants to see her friend again. They all share a hug, and now we're at the harbor or something where all those girls who were at the school are talking about what just went down.

If only Ami hadn't stopped them, they could have been done with the Messiah of Silence and stuff. Because she was a stupid idealist the bad guy got away. But because she was a stupid idealist, she also kind of saved their lives so... thanks?

Gee don't sound so convinced.

They share some laughs and the camera flies off into the sky because it's end credits time.

Here I was hoping they'd do a little bit more with what little time remains, but in the end, I can't help but feel nothing of value was actually accomplished with this episode?

I rate this one with a resounding MEH. Because really? Nothing was added except the Professor now knows who they are. Big deal. They're still no closer to ending this thing...

Ah well. Five episodes left, hopefully they will end THIS season with something better than LAST season. God that was a travesty that must never, EVER be repeated.

EVER.