Dog Days' Episode 11 - Change My Heart

I just watched this show like, the other day. Yet here I am watching it again. It's like some kind of nightmare you can't wake up from. Except that you know there has to be an end at some point because there's only three episodes left but something keeps nagging at you suggesting that something is just not entirely right with the situation.

... yeah, I've been having more nightmares lately. I like to imagine the bad anime has something to do with all that.

Blah blah recap blah Adel crashed the party and everyone loved it roll opening.

I will be so glad when I never have to look at this ever again.

So. Happy. So happy I might cry. I think actual tears will flow when this is over. Because I'll never have to watch it again.

Anyways, we find out that the FIRST DAY OF THIS STUPID FESTIVAL IS FINALLY OVER. Also Pastillage came out on top and they ask the crazy squirrel princess what they attribute their victory to.

Like no one ever was?

But at least she gives credit where it is due and admits the only reason they managed to come out on top this time around is because they cheated.

Y'know. Cheated.

Also, NotSaber continues to call herself Hero Mask despite not wearing the mask, fooling exactly no one.

Yeah well that's what tends to happen when you retire.
*cues airhorn*

Leo and Cousin declare they will beat her ass next time, and Adel is revelling in all of the attention once more.

Then someone cues up 99 Luftballoons and people lose their damn mind.

Okay so maybe a few more than 99...

Anyways today is... a beach episode. Oh god.

SEE ISN'T WAR JUST THE GREATEST YOU GET TO
PLAY BEACH VOLLEYBALL AND EVERYTHING!

My brain can't even fathom what is going on anymore. It just can't.

They literally wanted an excuse to have everyone in bathing suits.

EVERY. ONE.

I MEANT EVERYONE.

... oh my god you really aren't even trying at this point.
WHAT IS WITH THEM AND THEIR LOVE FOR
HAVING THE PRINCESS HOLD PHALLIC OBJECTS?!?!

So she shoots off her... whatever the f**k that is, and...

... oh my f**k no.

She's holding a concert. While people ride other people.
*sobs gently*

Y'know, it's been awhile since I made an animated gif around here. And my brain cannot even process what the f**k is going on anymore. Words fail to perform. I can only show you.

I am no longer capable of braining at this point. I just can't.

I tried. I really did. But I can't.

I legitimately have no. F***ing. Clue. What is going on.

Just. Just none.

Oh look, Adel got de-topped.

... was that the point of the contest?

WHAT DOES ANY OF THIS HAVE TO DO WI-
y'know what just f**k it.

Also I guess a bunch of other shit happened later on after that but it's not important enough for them to show some stupid quiz show so we're just moving on to something more exciting I guess.

Wait. You just said... you're actually showing us that shit
you told us about three seconds ago in the monologue?!

I take it back. They showed it anyways.

Also, arm wrestling happens.

Adel takes on lion general dude who shits himself on stage, and then it was night time and everyone had a big feast to commemorate the things.

.... art?

Oh and there's also some 'final event' on the 'final day'. NO SHIT.

Give that we're five minutes in, I'm going to guess that we're probably going to be getting into that stuff pretty soon. Blah blah it was great that nothing bad happened DURING A F***ING WAR, and everyone deserves a pat on the back. Then some dude we know nothing about is told to lead a toast and he seems nervous but he's like "yeah so peace love and all that good stuff have fun".

Then Becky and crazy squirrel show up, and Becky confirms that bro is going out with Milhi for a daily walk in the morning. But crazy squirrel decides to invite Milhi to come back with them seeing as how she's doing a song and dance over at her place the next day anyhow. Also, where is she going for her walk tomorrow?

That is really quite descriptive of you, princess.

Night gives way to day, and we head out into the woods somewhere. Where there is a stream.

Oh yay how very *yawn* exciting.

This is the same place he did that training thing the last time. Then boob ninja shows up and they head over to the shack. Sadly they missed the brother/sister combo who are off mining some ore, but whatever they can hang out and chill and eat fish or whatever it is they're supposed to do here.

This makes Cinque uncomfortable for some reason.

Yes Cinque. Do you want to rub yourself on her fluffy tail?

You ever wonder if maybe the total insanity of the world around
him is finally beginning to dawn on him?

Then they have some food which is fried fish and rice, Milhi used to play here all the time when they were younger, and all the girls there have some time to reminisce about gods and stuff. Enter the flashback where everyone was tiny. Even Rico, who was somehow smaller than she is now.

Oh look they're pandering to the moe crowd again.

And then next thing Yuki knew she had melons the size of her head.

But then Milhi sees a pretty stone in the corner of the room which takes us into the credits.

Cashing in on that Gurren Lagann thing huh?

So Milhi grabs the pretty stone, wonders what it is, and nobody knows. Cinque takes a look at it, and it turns out to be an egg or something which cracks and smoke pours forth. When it clears, there's something new there that wasn't around before.

Dunno.

Boob Ninja makes sure everyone is okay, and Cinque just sorta walks off. Except that's not Cinque. Cinque is... Milhi? Oh crap, everyone's changed bodies haven't they.

Well somebody won the lottery it seems.

Wait, no, Cinque is in Yuki's body.

... greaaaat.

Yuki is now Milhi, and Milhi is, most likely, the adorable puffball. Which means the puffball is in Cinque's body and has just wandered off to explore.

Oh and the moment they figure out its Milhi she inexplicably turns pink.

Anyways Cinque's body seems to be having a great time, and for some reason the 'brave connect' isn't working so they can't call for help and need to run off and deal with this themselves. Without their powers. Also, Cinque/Yuki can't run off looking like some hussie. Even though... that was never an issue before?

"You can't run around in my body looking like that young man!"

Moving seem sto be difficult but eventually they get booby boy changed and Cinque is off on a quest to quite literally find himself.

They have to be aware of what they are saying. They HAVE to be.

They decide they can't trust Cinquefox by himself so... uh, they send some foxes out to track the body down? Cinque has some weird experiences figuring out how to jump and run with giant knockers, and tries to focus not on the tig ol' bitties and more on remembering how Yuki usually moves so he can try to emulate what she does and not be distracted by the giant knockers trying to slap him in the face at every given turn.

Now there's a giant tree where the Cinquebody has gone off to, holding a stick. It is surrounded by the foxes and dogs, and decides, eh, I can just leap into the tree and does that.

Yukibody sees a flare go off, meets up with the others who tell him where his body is, and it's...

THAT IS NOT A PINE TREE.

THIS IS NOT WHAT A PINE TREE LOOKS LIKE EVER.

So now they decide to get his body back 'as a team', and some ninja stuff gets the chase going.

NOT A F***ING PINE TREE.

Y'know, I get the feeling the translation here may not exactly have been spot on because THIS IS CLEARLY NOT A CONIFEROUS F***ING TREE. So that's the last time I'm going to mention it. After all, there's no way they could be THAT F***ING STUPID.

Cinqueninja throws a glowing ninja star thing, knocking the body out of the tree, where a not-Milhi tries to blast it with a sword blast. Then Cinque kicks his own body, knocks the ever-loving shit out of himself, and everyone was just a little confused.

Just a bit.

The body tries to hurt the girls but then Ninja blasts the body to the ground again, 'serving justice'. But then his old body glows, and the puffball leaps forward. Milhi is back in her body, the puffball goes running off, and.... yeah, don't bother trying to follow this, it's just plain confusing.

So confusing.

Now they just need to get Yuki and Cinque switched at least. They kind of figure out how this thing works, they get a sealing talisman set up, and they have to figure out how to get the other two back into their bodies.

Oh, and we find out this was all Adel's fault once they're able to finally give her a call.

Yeah you're not a terrible heroic legend or anything.

So how do they return to normal? Give it time and they should go back to normal. But just in case they're on their way to make sure things get fixed.

Oh but uh, some other folks are on their way too.

With four minutes left this isn't sure to get awkward at all.

Well how are they gonna explain this? By explaining it, I guess.

Somehow, the squirrel keeps out-crazying Milhiore.

Becky says that would be stupid dumb and it has to go back to Adel and then they just sorta hang out for a bit. Milhi says this is her fault but it's really not (for once) and things will turn out okay anyways. It's just another one of thsoe crazy fun things! Milhi goes off with those other two, and now it's just Cinque and Yuki and person whose name we've already forgotten.

Which means it's time for them to kick bac-

THERE IS NO VERSION OF THIS WHICH ENDS WELL.

CinqueYuki says this is a HORRIBLE IDEA, and YukiCinque doesn't see the issue.

But then they glow and become themselves again thus resolving any potential conflict and they go off to have a bath I guess or something.

Now they're sitting around drinking tea or whatever.

There's a joke here somewhere.

Yuki says he looked awesome in her body and... oh boy.

You know this is a terrible idea, right? I'm telling you it is.

SERIOUSLY A TERRIBLE IDEA WHY WOULD YOU EVEN.

And this is why I can't keep watching this show. I can't keep
subjecting myself to this shit. I just can't.

Becky gets the good news, and everyone talks about how great it is when the humans come visit and be heroes and shit. Despite not having anything to hero about.

Then Leo and cousin are like "man this was like awesome" and she doesn't want to go home, and Leo suggests maybe the next time they visit maybel they can relax and stuff instead of WAR ALL THE TIME.

Adel goes and picks up the thing and Nanami is like "man this is awesome" and then the credits roll.

Christ. It is getting harder and harder to keep up with this show. Things just keep happening, but it's almost over. Two more episodes now. Two more. And then I can stop watching Dog Days.

It will all be so worthwhile once this is finally f***ing over.